She had almost forgotten what it was like to feel.
His lips felt warm and his hands were firm and confident in
what they were doing to her body; he seemed to know his way around pretty well
and did not need any directions…or permission…
And she let him
She had forgotten what it felt like to be taken, ravished, devoured,
appreciated…valued.
To feel warmth, to feel safe, and happy and wanton at the
same time.
It felt surreal, was it really her he was holding this way?
Kissing this way?
Making her weak in submission?
It was bound to happen anyway, one day, one way or another.
It had all been building up to this…the constant time spent
with him, and conversations that stimulated her mind, unravelling her imaginative
spirit.
It was in the way he’d make her laugh so hard her tummy hurt…
It was in the way he’d make her feel like she could do
anything, be anything, it was in the way he believed in her.
It felt so good, it felt consistent and true….like home, a
place to go anytime; a safe place
His kiss had gotten deeper and his tongue felt even warmer ; almost
hot she thought to herself…he tasted a little sweet and salty…as if he had just
had some salted candy..
She felt like she could eat him all up, immerse herself in
him, in his scent, get deeper in his chest…she felt her knees go weak and give
way, she felt him hold her even firmer..
She sighed as he caressed her breast, and gave out a small
gasp as he felt for her folds…
She had wanted this feeling to last…except….it didn’t….it couldn’t....like
everything else....it was too good to be real and only moments were enjoyed.
She threw her house keys on the coffee table and slumped on
the couch.
Life had gotten busy and the days had become duller by the
day, consumed by the shenanigans of adulting, of chasing paper and striving to
excel in the work environment; to “make a name for herself”; she had forgotten
what it was like to feel and for a moment he had reminded her what her body was
capable and what she had been missing; that she mattered too, as a person.
She took off her heels and slumped back in the softness of
the couch, it gave way as she sunk in it, almost as if to give her a hug after
the day she had had.
She untucked her blouse from her skirt to get more comfortable
and unbuttoned her it to reveal a pair of soft firm breasts in a laced bra, it
had been a long day at the office and she had been looking forward to this
moment right here.
To be by herself and just be …it was nice just being away
from the usual monotonous conversations at the office, making the necessary
talks to the necessary people in order to do the necessary work so she could
get paid and get her basic necessities at the end of the month.
The day had dragged on, long and dull with a line of boring
meetings from morning till late afternoon.
Chanda was always trying to show everyone how smart he was by
talking all the time, paraphrasing the same point and delaying the end of
almost every meeting. She had never met anyone more obnoxious.
She often wondered what his wife found so attractive about
him, Chanda had this wide nose, small eyes, and his hair looked like patches of
shrubs in the desert.
How could any woman sleep with him on a daily basis and
survive? She mused.
Perhaps it was because of the money. Anyway, it was none of
her business, after all, it’s not as if she had any real love story to write
home about…except for the moments with Will.
People didn’t love anymore she decided as she proceeded to
unzip her skirt; people used each other for relief…relief from life it seemed.
Nowadays a person can be with someone for convenience, for
the fear of being alone, for companionship, for money, to gain favors, to be
linked with specific networks…but love? Hm, love was farfetched.
The world was becoming even colder, and old fashioned love
rarely existed anymore.
There were just too many lies and superfluousity.
She sat there in her bra and G-string as she appreciated the
cool air on her warm skin coming through from the open window.
The curtains billowed softly
Then there was Elizabeth who was married with two children, her
husband was seemingly well off but she never really looked happy.
She was always the first one to come in and the last one to
leave the office, she seemed to spend more time at the office working than
spending time with her family.
There were rumors that her husband had been cheating on her
with a student from a local university.
Another rumor suggested the reasons she was always early and knocking
off late was because she was having an affair with the accountant who followed
similar time patterns.
The office was full of rumors anyway; better to just mind
your business, people’s tongues always wagged there.
A shower would definitely ease out all the day’s tension and
Chanda’s constant chatter, she needed to reset. She stood up and headed for the
bathroom.
Can someone actually love you? As in genuinely love you no
questions asked? She thought to herself as she turned on the shower and
proceeded to remove her bra and string…
She closed her eyes as the water hit her shoulder and ran
down her body. She stood still as the water continued to hit on her shoulder, that
one spot on the shoulder; for some reason it felt comforting.
Time flies so quickly, one minute you’re just a girl full of
dreams for the future, and the next minute you’re a full grown woman, an adult
that had barely enough time to dream…chasing bills, office reports, family
problems, occasional social activities where you had to fake smiles in order to
fit in…
She lathered her bath sponge with soap and rubbed herself
gently and slowly as her mind continued to wonder about the day…
The rich lather ran down her legs taking a journey through
her crevices…
Love can be so dynamic, it cannot always be found in what you’d
call traditional set ups, sometimes it can be found in the most unorthodox ways.
Sometimes it only lasts for a short while.
Sometimes we can love someone based on our moment in life, a
particular phase in our life that has drawn us to certain people.
Sometimes loving someone is not always for a lifetime, and
sometimes you can love someone that you cannot be with for a lifetime.
Sometimes the person you love, love’s someone else and you
may be their alternative due to the unreciprocated love they actually want.
Some rare times you can actually meet someone that matches
your vibe and fire and you would not think about being with anyone apart from
them.
And sometimes…like Will...you love them silently, close, yet
far and once in a while they remind you of what you need, what you are capable
of, your vulnerabilities and your strengths.
A friend and a lover.
Someone you can have and cannot have all in one.
There was a knock on the door, she turned off the shower; wrapped
a towel around herself and quickly tiptoed to answer it.
Will stood there with a grin on his face: “Hi, I got us some
pizza”
